L’Agent by Agent Provocateur: Autumn Winter 2013 Campaign
It has been an age since I’ve actually written something here rather than just reblogged - there’s a lot of good stuff out there and I have gotten lazy. Anyway, Genghis had also insisted that we “move on” - so high school. Well, guess what out of the freakin’ blue about a week ago I get a text and yup, you guessed it - Genghis, do I want to chat? Seriously?! Well, hot damn of course I do, but man I have been sitting on my hands not wanting to text or call you because the rejection had been just too much. Long story short I got home stripped of my clothes, ‘cause just the thought of him can make them fly off and well, it was hot, long distance but hot. All this time later and I remember everything about his voice, his body, the taste of his skin and damn it I miss it so much! I don’t think that I have or ever will get over him - it’s just that I have learned to live without him. But I tell you I enjoyed the few hours we had on the phone - more so because they were initiated by him.
Then there it was first thing Sunday morning - his morning after remorse… those three dots… hanging out there in space like he has something to say but won’t… am I ok? He feels so bad… on and on - long and short of it - he stills thinks about me “all the time”, “you’re so sexy, gorgeous curvy” according to him and he was thanking me for being the woman that I am… WTF? Ok, great boosts to the ego, but the last part - thank you for the woman you are… ok, my turn for the three dots. I am not quite sure what to make of it. I always find myself wanting to examine everything as far as Genghis is concerned. I have come to the realization that I will always have a soft spot for him - no matter where life takes me. As usual he is able to turn this off like a tap - I am told that men have the propensity to do this - me, not so much. I spent the week after looking for tickets to Scotland and researching the perfect fuck me hotel. Then of course there were the fantasies about what I would wear, how we would meet, where we would fuck… you know the drill. Great fantasies, but they will only become reality if I push to make it happen, i.e. I get myself on a plane. I will one day and the reassuring thing about it all is that I can an will be in control.
It is all too much for Genghis - he is chasing Bahrain chica - after all these years he still chases after love (his version) because I really truly think that he is afraid of being alone. I really believe that he somewhere deep inside he doesn’t feel worthy of love and so he finds himself chasing down this long shot or worse saving someone form themselves. I am not convinced that Bahrain chica will last - flash in the pan, something to hold on to because everything else, including his relationship with his son is messy. I know his boy adores his Daddy, but Genghis has now opted in his divorce to be more absentee than he would like - he still claims that things with his ex are great. Yup, I don’t buy it.
Well, back to my life and reality - but man, that was a delicious diversion and knowing me I will have that fantasy moment… just watch.
In the meantime this Agent Provacateur ad is a good start - enjoy!
(Source: ughpsh, via youngfolksociety)